Showing posts with label new life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new life. Show all posts

Monday, June 10, 2024

Alone Time


The first time I shopped alone for fun since I can remember!

How important is "alone time?" I think it varies from person to person. As a creative soul I've always craved a lot of alone time. That's something I didn't get much of when I was very ill. I was always at the doctors, asleep or with someone. It doesn't count when you're asleep by the way.

Now that I'm managing my diseases I still don't have much alone time. It seems I'm always with my husband, adult son or mother. My husband only works away from home two days a week. There almost always seems to be something to do on one or both of those days. A medical appointment or gathering or some kind that leaves me "not alone." 

When I am alone I am very good at filling my time with "busy work." Things that need to get done but usually aren't important. Laundry, watering the garden, walking the dogs, that kind of thing. Day-to-Day tasks. Not making art or working on my CEU's. I can fill days and days of time this way. Making medical appointments is a particular specialty of mine.

As someone who has never lived alone I'm pretty used to be around others constantly. Kids of course are rarely alone, so I didn't have too much time by myself even though I'm an only child. There were always friends over, parents around, grandparents, other kids, teachers, classrooms full of kids... you get the picture. 

Solitude is welcome. I'm working on practicing savoring my alone time more and making the most of it.




Tuesday, September 26, 2023

A Second Teenage-hood

Remembering back to when I was a teenager, this time in my life doesn't feel all that different. I'm not talking about the pimples and stress. But the discovery phase of everything feeling new and exciting. Who do I want to be? What do I want to look like? What are my tastes? What tools do I need for the life I want and for who I am NOW?

The person I was two months ago could not be any different from the person I am today. I am full of energy and ready for an adventure at all times. Strangely enough, my style has also changed.


I shaved my head yesterday. #3 all over. I love it.
Going back to my natural color.

I've always been incredibly organized, but now I feel I'm even more so. The tingling of modernism aesthetics is pulling at my maximalist style. The "bohemian a la mode" that I've loved for so long is going by the wayside to be replaced by Ikea cleanliness. White is my new favorite color for my house (it was orange and teal.) I find myself wanting to purge most of my belongings and start over fresh.

My local Goodwill must be thrilled with all the donations they've been getting from me. Including my BiPap and Cough Assist machines. I have my old blue electric wheelchair up for sale on Ebay, but may just end up donating that as well. I'm keeping my new chair and the wheelchair van for now. 

I'm humored that I most needed to buy good walking shoes along with more bras. I stopped wearing bras 99% of the time when I was so sick because they took way too much energy to take on and off. Then obviously my shoes didn't matter much since I used my chair any time I left the house. Now I need a lot of support for the weaker muscles in my feet. And I actually want to wear a bra. I'm enjoying having this time to explore. It is a real luxury.

Tuesday, September 12, 2023

Shiny New Life

What does one do with a shiny new life?

I feel nothing like I did. I think I was mostly dead. Just barely able to do things. To engage. To have a life. I am stunned at how different I feel. And how horrid I was before. Honestly, I have no idea how I was even getting out of bed. The difference is almost incomparable to how I feel now.

Is this what a full battery feels like? A full drawer of spoons? I feel energized. Reborn.

So what comes next?

I'm still building up my strength and stamina. It is going very well. I've been walking and gardening quite a bit. Sweating hard all day every day. That's a good start.

But also coming out of this horrible nightmarish fog is my brain. My brilliant buzzing little mind. It's able to get some nutrition again and the neurons and firing once more. And I'm a little bit bored.

I had the fantastic idea today that I could volunteer in my community. Just a little bit. It would be fun, interesting and a good way to get back into the habit of working. It is a wonderful feeling knowing you can do anything you want. I love animals, so I started searching for something in my town with animals that needed volunteers.


I came up our local raptor center. I adore raptors, especially vultures. This idea excited me. I gave them a call to see if they needed volunteers. They do and now I'm signed up for a volunteer information night. I am a woman of action.

The idea of helping out there excites me. Even if it's just cleaning cages. Getting to be that close to raptors, maybe even touch or feed one has me giddy! I'm so glad I thought of it.

Needless to say I feel like my energy is strong enough to handle something small like this. My future is looking so bright, but I'm not looking away. I'm diving in.



Magic

If I was told 3 magic beans would improve my quality of life I would buy them and eat them. Move over Jack. Every time I try something new, ...