Reflecting on 2022

This year felt much less dramatic than last. That's not a bad thing. I feel more settled. In my body and in my life. Routines came easy. I was very much "in the moment" the majority of the time. 

• I saw a lot of fantastic, beautiful animals at two zoos. Even made friends with a snow leopard!
• Spent a lot of time with family.
• Swam my little mermaid brains out.
  
  
  
• Completed physical therapy and learned skills to help with pain.
• Got to touch the ocean (more than once.)
  
  
  
• Saw some beautiful artwork at a museum.
• Learned how to make my own art with clay.
• Spent hundreds of hours with my amazing little dog who makes me laugh every day.
• Cooked, baked, grew flowers and food for my family.
• Hugged my Papa in person.
• Got a new wheelchair.
• Colored my hair PINK!
  
  
  
• Entered a short story and poetry contest.
• Saw stunning images of outer space.
• Learned lots of new things.

I just had my first two appointments at the pain clinic. I'm hoping to learn some new tools and get some support for my chronic pain. 

In 2023 I'm hoping...

To meet some more people struggling with similar symptoms to me. I feel like that's an important part of what's missing in my life right now.

I'm also still working on being gentle with myself. Not having crazy expectations. Doing what I'm able to do and not kicking myself for what I can't do.

Lastly I want to get back to a more gentle way of eating that reflects my ethics. I'm going to reduce my dairy. I also want to give up eating mammals. That still leaves me plenty of protein between seafood and chicken. I just don't feel good about eating animals given how much I love them. But I still require more protein than a simple vegetarian diet can offer.

Here's to a beautiful, hopeful 2023.

Showing Up

My Mom likes to say that "Life is all about showing up." To me what that means is I need to make the effort to put myself out there as much as I possibly can. As much as I physically can. 

"Chat" bike ride at night

Although life happens at home, in my pajamas, declining party invitations. It also happens at the party in my nice new dress. It happens when I say "Yes" and engage in life outside just as much as inside. 

Humans are social creatures. We need to be around other people. That's why COVID was so impossible for so many people. Isolation. Being chronically ill limits how much I can be out in the world. It also limits what I can still do since COVID is still very much alive and contagious.

Coffee with Mom in her festive home

Sometimes "showing up" can look like entering a poetry contest from home or encouraging someone on Instagram. Other times it can look like spending my Mom's birthday at the zoo or having coffee at her house. To me engaging is simply making an effort. Not letting my pain and illness take over me and keep me in solitude. 

Enjoying Zebra at the Zoo

Thanks to my family and friends I have near constant engagement and many ways in which to "show up."

Max cuddle