Depression and Chronic Illness - One Year Later

Last April I shared some tips on ways that I help myself with Chronic Illness and Depression. But sometimes that's just not enough. Last July I had a few weeks where I just couldn't stop crying. I was about to start a new job that wanted me to work 40 hours a week and was struggling with illnesses that then still had no name (now I know it was a brain tumor, Metabolic Myopathy and Rheumatoid Arthritis.) I talked with my doctor and he put me on Cymbalta. That helped my mild depression and my joint pain. Things were good. 

Fast forward to today and I'm feeling the fog of depression again. I'm feeling numb to things I should feel engaged in, everything feels hard like I'm running through molasses (and I'm not talking physically, but mentally and emotionally.) I feel sad and things at work that are usually easy are becoming hard. I sometimes think about being dead and how lovely it would be (but not to worry, I'm not suicidal. There's a difference.) I feel overwhelmed and exhausted mentally. 

I think these are very common feelings when one is struggling with a medical condition or chronic illness. I once asked a friend with a spinal cord injury how she keeps so positive and she said "I don't allow myself to think any other way." So Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is what works for her. For me that can only work so long or so well.

So I messaged my doctor yesterday about increasing my Cymbalta. He asked my symptoms and I shared with him and now he wants to see me today to talk in person. I'm ok with that. I'm suspecting that instead of increasing my Cymbalta he'll want to put me on something else. Any help I can get will be appreciated.

But why not try therapy first? Well, I've had a lot of therapy in the past and I'm actually really good at using my non-medical tools. But I think there comes a time when therapy just isn't enough. You need help and you need it fast. 

On the non-medical mental health front I am trying out a support group on Saturday May 18th in my area with the Muscular Dystrophy Association. It's a "Mixed Diagnosis Group." So it's for adults with all forms of MD to come and talk. Partners are also welcome so my amazing husband will be coming with me. You can never have too much help or too many tools.