My Brain Is Back!

It's not just my muscle strength, stamina and energy that have returned to me. I can also feel my mind becoming sharper each day. This is very exciting to me because it means I can go back to work at some point. I gave up a career that I loved when I could no longer focus or retain what was being said to me. My short term memory and recall were both terribly impacted by my mitochondrial disease. Both are vital to my work.

I also had physical coordination issues that made working on the computer for any prolonged period a serious challenge. Then there was the fatigue. Sorry, that makes it not sound so bad. I mean FATIGUE! The worst of the lot. Actually they all suck. There is no winner here, just me losing all my faculties.

I could tell when I was recently able to play games again that I was starting to recover. Then when I was able to win a few... well... I can't even express how thrilling that was. And not just because I'm competitive. It meant that my brain was getting back online.

Now that I reflect I'm astonished at how well my body ran during that time when I was so terribly ill. How my brain and body worked at all? I think it was just sheer stubbornness and will on my part. Of course I wouldn't feel up to playing games. I could barely function.

The longer I'm at the gym the kinder I feel towards my body and the miracle that is me. I've been through so much physically and mentally. No wonder COVID had a minimal impact on me mentally. I was already in my own hellish war. Now I'm working my way back to health. Trying to shake damaging eating patterns. Attempting to nurture myself inside and out. I feel so incredibly lucky that my brain didn't check out completely and I can feel everything coming back online.